Being Thankful for my Mom Friends

I meant to post this around Thanksgiving, but as things happen I didn't. Now, I am approaching the end of another year and I am once again motivated to recognize the impact of these special women in my life.

This year has brought about many changes in my day-to-day life and my immediate identity. We sold our home and are currently squatting (LOL) with my fantastic, easy-going MIL. That alone has created an environment of transience though which we are still trying to navigate. Secondly, for myself and for our family, I have begun the (slow) transition back into full-time work. In addition to losing my "home office" this year, I have also resigned by position as SAHM and have been putting myself out there "in the real world" for several months now. I have two consulting jobs starting in the new year and I am both thankful to have found interesting work and retain the ability to work from home.

I am not alone in experiencing many personal transitions this year. Many of my closest mom friends are now starting new chapters of their lives. One is homeschooling her kindergartener. Two have relocated out of state for their husbands' jobs. While, two more have decided to reset their stay-at-home mom life clock back to zero by having their 3rd baby.

These women are so special to me. They have endured the SAHM boot camp with me and celebrated the crazy joys that come along with spending so much time with our young children. We have met for over a hundred play dates, birthday celebrations, coffee breaks and the occasional sanity saving glass of wine. I read that it takes 6,000 hours of effort in an activity to become an expert. Well, I am so thankful to have spent my 6,000 hours with a wonderful group of ladies. I feel as if we have graduated from something very significant and I miss you guys dearly! Life keeps changing and that's okay.

Here's to my battle buddies, Jen, Michal, Lane, Daniela, Jess, Lisa, Loran, Hilary.  Love you girls!

- I'd post pics of these great ladies, but we never took any pictures of the moms at our festivities!

Stay at home dads were everywhere!

Today I was surrounded by dads. We went to the library later than usual and I was outnumbered by dads with their young children. Dads reading to their kids, engaging with them and the train set, trying to figure out the computers. Again, at the park, there were many dads with their children, some engaged, some on their phones. I have NEVER seen this many dads during the workweek before. I loved it. Cheers to them. I know that fathers today spent more time with their kids than ever before. I've seen the ONE dad's playdate group on Meetup.com. But, we've (I've) never been outnumbered. It made me wonder if there is a group of stay at home dads that hovers in the shadows until the mass of stay at home moms depart the usual preschool hangouts.

Educational Apps for 3-5 year olds

I love the internet! I really do. Late one afternoon, during that nefarious time of day known as the witching hour, I needed to fill some time before hubby came home and fast. We had already done a boat load of things that day and we had maxed out our tv time. Panic and hysteria were nipping on my heels.

In a moment of clarity, I did a quick search for "best educational apps for pre-k" and clicked on one of the top results that looked like a blog review. After twenty seconds of reading, I bought the first app on the list, TeachMe ($.99 for preschool and $1.99 for Kinder) .Within five minutes, both kids were happily playing/learning. It lasted 45-60 minutes. Awesomeness!

I really liked the TeachMe app because there were apps for each grade from preschool through 3rd grade. I honestly didn't look past the first app on the list, but I'm sure the others are good, too. You can read the blog post from Technologyinearlychildhood.com here. Thank you Karen!

Playing Catchup: October 2014

So, this was October....

They waited an entire year to build a humongous leaf pile. Done! They asked for another one in December...

We spent a long weekend in the Smoky Mountains. Some great friends came up with us and hiked Laurel Falls trail. The foliage was beautiful. The kids were troopers. The hike was 1 mile uphill to the  falls. I ended up making a baby carrier out of my scarf to help carry them on this hike and the next. It was worth it.

 We hosted a chili party at the house. It was a great day. This was their "Make a silly face!" Thanks to Pinterest, I made a "photo op" display. This was the only picture taken with it - KISS again!

I was thrilled to receive a quick Halloween visit from my bestie, Jen, from Virginia. Her boys were able to join our Halloween party at the house. Isn't she stylish?

Here are all of the cuties at our Meetup Halloween party.

My kids can never commit to one Halloween costume. But this year, their favorite kid in the universe wanted to be a Power Ranger. So, they both wanted to be Power Rangers, too. I altered their costumes because they were two sizes too big. That was a sewing adventure for me. The McLeas, my sister and nephew came to our neighborhood to trick-o-treat with us. It was EXTREMELY cold that night, so we didn't ride in the back of the truck as planned. This is the first year the kids really got into trick-or-treating, but we visited over 20 houses - a record.

Playing Catchup: September 2014

My sweet Aunt Connie asked me for my blog URL today on Facebook. Oh yeah, that thing I used to do when I only had one kid. Second to a friend posting a "reader request," this inquiry about my blog rekindled by passion for writing this thing...Since it's been a while, I thought I'd write a monthly summary of our goings on since my last post in August 2014.

So, this was September...

This girl turned 3...She was happy, that is, up to two seconds before I asked her to smile for this picture and again two seconds after. This face was just for fun, just for me.  Seriously, she had a great birthday. Her big present was transitioning from a toddler bed into a big girl bed. She literally squealed when she saw it. Thanks to her Daddy and Uncle Jason for making that happen during her party. She had a themed Princess & Pirates party. This year, she actually had girl friends to invite! I made pirate costumes for the boys to wear and none of them wanted to, awesome. In hindsight, I want to tell myself "KISS - Keep It Simple Silly!" But, I love them and love to party plan and so I do.

Grandma visited...always fun. I love this lady. XOXO














Mommy traveled with other Princesses to Memphis for food, music and fun...We did Memphis right in 36 hours, stayed at the Peabody Hotel, Graceland, Stax Museum, Sun Records, (the other music museum, lol), BB Kings live music, Gus's Fried Chicken, Alcenia's Chicken and Waffles. Much better than all of that cool touristy stuff was getting to spend time with women in my family and seeing how awesome they are in their own right. Love you all!

The kids' preschool FINALLY started...ours starts one month after public schools. The kids and I
were DONE with summer at the beginning of August. Just DONE.















We went apple picking at Breeden's Orchard with our Meetup Group. The kids loved it. Super close, super cute. I learned: 1) that Jason Thomas was very competitive even with picking apples 2) what to do with a boatload of golden delicious apples; and 3) that my kids don't like to eat golden delicious apples.

Counting game with Q tips

I found this game on Pinterest and tried it at home. All you need are straws and Q-tips and a bucket. This entertained the kids for about a half an hour this morning.

First we set a bucket on a child's chair and sat in the floor with our straws. We shot and aimed and did this for about 10 minutes. Then, my four-year-old wanted to try the game on our stairs. We already have each riser labeled with the numbers 1-10, but we did not use them for this game. Next, I laid a tablecloth upside down on our dining room table and labeled 10 sections 10 through 100. We are just starting to learn counting by tens so I wanted to see how my son would respond to this. I think it was a good exercise and help him recognize some of the numbers.

I cleaned out my van!

It was time to clean out the van. It happens every couple of months. The van threatens to mutate into a living beast. One clue was that all four pair of my son's shoes were living there. Plus, you couldn't see the floorboards...don't judge me. If you are a stay at home mom or a busy mom with multiple kids, you know how easy it is for things to pile up out of control. It was so dirty that it was comical. I made the kids document the cleanup with a picture. The small bag was trash and the pop up hamper held all of the "stuff," including 11 shoes, two puddle jumpers, a picnic blanket, pillow and lots of toys and hair bows. The biggest surprise was a new cookbook I've never seen before.

This wasn't the worst it's ever been either. At the beginning of summer, Caroline ate the bottom out of her ice cream cone in her car seat. Melted ice cream congealed in and below her car seat. 

All you can do is laugh and get out the vacuum! My friend and author of Passion Mom 31 wrote a funny story about her minivan and all of it is true. Head over to her blog to check it out.

I dare other moms tosh are pics of their minivans.

Taco Bar Dinner Party

Last night, we had so much fun hosting Game Night at our house and eating from a casual yet gourmet taco bar menu. If you are looking for a quick solution to planning your next dinner party, below are the links to the recipes I used in last night's dinner for 6.

Getting Started
Bon Appetit Taco Bar Menu Planner - This is a great place to get ideas and finalize your bar menu. I used it to guide my meat, toppings and filling options. We had enough food for 10 or 12 probably.

My Menu
Appetizers: Zesty Black Bean Dip, Texas Caviar, Chips
Tacos: Chicken, Tilapia, Shrimp, Chorizo
Toppings: Pico de gallo, peach salsa, salsa, guacamole, cilantro lime dressing
Fillings: Red cabbage, lettuce, tomatoes, queso fresca, jalepenos, onions, cilantro
Sides: Rice, Mexican Street Corn
Drinks: Margaritas, Mexican coffee

Mojito Lime Marinade for Chicken by Grill Mates (It was fabulous!)
Shrimp Marinade by Life's Ambrosia (Marinated it in a mason jar)
Fish Taco Marinade (we used tilapia)
Chorizo by Bon Appetit
Pico de gallo by Bon Appetit
Zesty Black Bean Dip by Five Heart Home (my favorite dish of the night)
Texas Caviar by Sarah Fit (my guest actually made our caviar, but this is a similar recipe)
Peach Salsa by Cooking on the Front Burner (great for fish and shrimp)
Mexican Street Corn by The Baker Upstairs
Mexican Coffee by Food Network

Decor
From Bed Bath and Beyond, I found an inexpensive bamboo table runner in festive colors for the dining table and two bamboo place mats in coordinating colors for the island. For centerpieces, I bought two bouquets of spider mums from Kroger on clearance, $1.99 per bouquet. I cut each flower very short and placed it in a votive of dried black beans and water. Finally, I placed a few candles around the house that were nestled in dried black beans. Overall, I spent about $25 on decorations.

ABC game using lids

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This is an easy game to setup at home using lids, a sharpie pen and wax paper.

Step one – collect lids from water bottles juice bottles,  milk cartons etc.

Step two – using a sharpie, write each letter of the alphabet and the letters zero through 20 on a lid.

Step three – trace each lead on wax paper in their correct order. This way your child can match up the letters if he is an early learner. 

Step four – now just make up games. The first few times, I put all of the lids in the jar and my son picked one out and placed it and it's correct spot. He thought this was similar to being go and therefore likes to play the game. After a few times, I asked him to find the letters of his first and middle name. This was helpful because I am trying to teach him how to spell his name so that he can write his name on his own. 

When they are of this game, I can throw them into a sandbox and ask them to go on ABC treasure hunt.

Our Summer Bucket List

Our Summer Bucket List

Although June is coming to an end, I thought I might as well post our summer bucket list. We are on a good pace to check all of these off the list, especially since the kids don't go back to school until September.

1.  Go Bowling!
Thanks to the national KidsBowlFree.com initiative, bowling alleys across the country are providing two free games of bowling every day this summer. Parents register their children online. Locally, free games are offered at Hermitage Lanes at certain times Monday through Sunday. Click here to register online: https://www.kidsbowlfree.com.

2.  Fizz, Boom, Read!
The Mount Juliet Library's summer reading program celebrates science with a wide variety of programs for a variety of ages. Highlights include a planetarium theater show, Adventure Science Center programs, environmental science experiments, Mr. Carl the Science Guy, Meteorology Day with Snowbird and Lisa Patton and Toy Physics. Other non-science programming includes magic shows, music programs, balloon fun and story time. Of course, don't forget to sign up your kids, ages two and up, for the summer reading program to earn prizes. Adults can also sign up for an adult summer reading program to win an e-reader.

3.  Splish, Splash!
Ava's Splash Pad is an awesome place for the kids of Wilson County. I like it here so much better than at the downtown Cumberland Park. Although I wished they opened much earlier in the summers (say 9am), it is a great way to stay cool locally. I've heard great things about the Jimmy Floyd outdoor pool. Plus, Old Hickory Country Club has a wonderful swim team for youth.

4.  Snowball Fight!
I found this great recipe on Pinterest to make snowballs out of corn starch and shaving cream. My friend and I did this one day recently and it was a blast.

5.  Stamp Our Passport!
We are taking a family vacation to Cancun, Mexico in July! Andale! The kids' passport photos are hilarious. Pray that we don't get sick!

6.  Take me out to the ball game!
We've got to get our kids out to a baseball game this summer.  We could check out the Nashville Sounds in their final season in Greer Stadium or make the trek to Atlanta to support our Braves.

Snapshots of our summer from 2011

I never got around to posting these pictures from 2011 and I don't know why! Jason Thomas was just the cutest!

Playdate Idea: Summertime Snowball Fight!

It's 90 degrees here in Tennessee and what better way to beat the heat than to have a snowball fight! I found this easy recipe on Pinterest and I have been OBSESSED with trying it out. You should too! It is cheap, easy to make, the kids had so much fun and it was easy to wash off.

Recipe: 2 boxes corn starch, 1 can shaving cream
Makes 25 snowballs (good for two kids)

Helpful Tips:
*Make your snowballs outside and without your kids around (if possible). It took us about 20 minutes to prepare everything.
*We divided the kids into teams and put the snowballs in between them. They had to run to get them.
*Even after the initial fight, parts of the snowballs were still intact. Parents or kids could make more to extend the snowball fight.
*It washes off the kids surprisingly easy.
*If you want to get fancy, or if this is for a birthday party (like a Frozen themed party), you could add glitter, confetti or essential oils to your mixture.

For more play date ideas, follow my Play Date Board on Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/mproctor3514/play-date-fun/

36 Hours in Williamsburg, Virginia with Kids

My family just returned from a weekend trip to Williamsburg, Virginia. We took the trip with our close family friends, The Skippers. Between us, there were four kids, ages 7, 5, 4 and 2. We dared to see all that Williamsburg had to see in 36 hours. Could it be done?

A donut social for tiny friends.

Day 1 - Jamestown, Colonial Williamsburg, Bowling

Every great journey begins with a little pomp and circumstance. When traveling with young children, it's usually strong coffee for adults and something sweet for the kids. In our case, it was the Big D - donuts. Ben took all four kids for a special secret mission our first morning in Williamsburg to pick up donuts for the mommies. They were good (the kids, I mean). It was special. They got donuts.

We were out the door by 9 or so. Our first stop was Jamestown. Jamestown is historically important because it was the first permanent English colony established in 1607, thirteen years before the Pilgrims landed in Massachusetts. There. You learned something today. Reading this blog post wasn't a waste of your time.

After purchasing tickets, we took a leisurely stroll through their indoor museum. There was an informative movie playing, but we had fun looking at the wide variety of exhibits. The original site was discovered nearby in 1993 and many of the artifacts are on display in the museum. The walk through the museum took about 20-30 minutes. My four year old son's favorite part was the interactive map that allowed him to push buttons to display the location of fights with the local natives, the Powhatans. He talked about this a couple days after our visit. My two year old girl stayed the longest at a journal preserved by one of the settlement visitors. She pretended to read me a story, "Once upon a time..." It was precious.

After the indoor museum, we walked outside to the full replica of a Powhatan hut village. The kids were able to go inside the huts and learn about life in the village. They used shells to hollow out a log for a canoe. Next, they also used shells to comb the hair from a deer hide to make clothing. This part also lasted another 20-30 minutes. Everyone had to wash their hands after handling the deer hide. Smelly, but worth it.

Next, we walked to the water to tour the recreated settlement ships, Susan Constant, Godspeed and Discovery. Each ship had an actor onboard that provided interesting details. 106 settlers came over on these three ships. They slept on top of their luggage. It must have been brutal. The kids enjoyed exploring the ships and playing with the cannons. The ships were a highlight for the adults in the group. We stayed about 20-30 minutes here, too.

Those tiny dots on top deck are the three boys and my friend, Jen.

The last stop was a short walk to James Fort. We followed the chickens to a thatched-roof structure with a large kitchen. The actor told us about the foods the settlers ate (pottage), how they preserved meat (boat loads of salt) and how they used to trade guns for food. We toured a recreated settler's home, the Governor's house and the blacksmith building. Here, the kids were able to sample swords. See below to see my son holding a pirate sword and making his best pirate face.

After Jamestown, we took a twenty minute ride to colonial Williamsburg. Home of the College of William and Mary, the town is quaint and collegiate. Parking could have been tricky, but we found a spot close by our destination, The Cheese Shop. Located in Merchants Square, The Cheese Shop is a family owned business that provides gourmet sandwiches, specialty snack foods, cheese and wine. It has been featured in The New York Times and Frommer's. Their known for their homemade House Dressing (awesome). I had a wonderful roast beef on sourdough with a spicy ginger ale. This is perfect upscale picnic food. For fine dining sans children, our friends also recommend the sister restaurant The Fat Canary next door.

After lunch, we took the mile walk down Duke of Gloucester Street from Merchant Square to the Capitol Building. If you want to go into many of the homes or buildings, you can pick from several ticketing options. We chose to keep it free and just take a stroll. It was an easy walk with lots of diversions for the kids (see below). Beware, Virginia is hot and muggy in June. The perfect end to this leg of our trip was a stop at the Wythe Candy and Gourmet Shop. It is a wonderful specialty store with unusual candies and treats. I have seriously thought about how to ship their German gummy bear cubs home. Yum!

Photo at Parents' Request.

After an hour or so respite at the house, we rallied and took the kids bowling. Williamsburg Lanes is seriously the cleanest and brightest bowling alley I have ever been. For some reason, I have a thing about really clean establishments and high heath food scores and what not. I was so impressed that I had to ask the manager about it. He had spent 20+ years in many bowling alleys and agreed that this was, by far, the cleanest one he had been in. I knew my instincts were right. Anyway...bowling was also fun. My son kept getting "stripes," or spares. The kids practiced their victory dances.

Day 2 - Yorktown, Local Mexican

On the final morning of our trip, we visited the Yorktown Victory Center. Located adjacent to the Yorktown battlefield, the Center brings the period of the American Revolution to life through exhibits, first hand accounts, a recreated Continental army encampment and a 1780's farm. To be honest, I remember nothing from the indoor museum.  The army encampment was intriguing because you could pick up everything. The soldier below showed visitors how cannons were prepared and fired prior to a live cannon shooting. It was loud, but one of the top highlights of the visit.

Though the Center was under construction, it did not hamper our visit. The farm was a short walk across the parking lot from the museum. The first stop ended up being the favorite among the kids. Can you guess what it was? A clothes washing station. The kids loved stirring the socks in the giant pot over the unlit campfire. Each took turns and then came back later after looking at other things. The kids also helped an actor pickle cucumbers as she explained how they prepared their foods. They loved being involved. Plus, their garden was lovely, orderly and enviable. I liked the Yorktown farm visit better than the Jamestown Fort partly because it was not as overwhelming for the kids but also because the garden was great.

We were probably in and out of Yorktown in about two hours. Spent, we finished the trip with lunch at a local Mexican joint and headed back to Charlottesville. We feel pretty good about getting as much in as we could with kids in Williamsburg. Of course, we didn't do and see it all. Below is a short list of other attractions that are worthwhile for families with young children in Williamsburg.

Other things to see and do in Williamsburg:

The Yorktown Battlefield, the site of the last major battle of The Revolutionary War
Busch Gardens
Water Country USA
The Williamsburg Battlefield, Civil War battlefield site

Other cute pics of the kids in Williamsburg:

At James Fort, the kids tried on kid sized replicas of soldier gear.

The grass isn't always greener...

I'm going to pull a Michael Jordan and bring this blog back out of retirement. My apologies. I thought I wanted a shiny new blog, "Sentimental Mom Blog." I had good intentions and big plans one day. Of course, that was a long, long time ago in mothering minutes. Gone are my big aspirations for my mommy blog. Back is my love for all my previous posts and comments. I regret breaking up my previous blog thread. JockMomma represents my first year as a mother and I want to build upon  those memories.

Right now, I've abandoned my children to the bonus room. Both have electronic devices. Both are stark naked after having run through the sprinklers this morning. It is the unofficial start to summer. Their mother's day out program ended last week. We have about 100 uninterrupted days together. SMILE. I am equal parts terrified and excited at the prospect of having no school all summer. I'm sure  most parents can agree.

Life is N-U-T-S with two kids this young and close in age. I abandoned my blog for almost the first two years of my younger child's life. It was THAT hard. Mostly because the 2nd child was 1,000% more difficult than my first. Some call it the "2nd child syndrome." She has beaten me psychologically, emotionally, mentally and physically many a day. Many a day...Woe to us when she enters adolescence and woe to any man who ends up marrying her. Love you CeCe! More posts (and therapist conversations) about her later.

The minions are stirring, got to go.

Moving This Blog...Follow me!

I've decided to start a new mommy blog for lots of reasons:

• I can hardly claim jock mom status anymore...
• we welcomed our second child back in September, a sweet and sassy girl and I want a new blog to reflect our family and 
• this blog is tied to an old gmail address of mine and for some INSANE reason Blogger will not allow you to transfer blogs from one account to another.

Since I was 12, I have kept a journal, recording my every secret thought and desire.  Starting this mommy blog has been a fun experience for me. First, it's a great way to share all of the ups and down of becoming a parent with your "real" and "cyber" friends. Second, I always enjoy practicing writing and story telling and it makes me happy when people tell me they enjoy my stories. Thirdly, since I don't scrapbook or maintain any baby books, this blog has been a good way to keep track of my baby's milestones.  Finally, I have enjoyed connecting with other mom bloggers primarily through SocialMoms.net.  You read that one of the biggest rewards of blogging is forming new relationships. Whether you are a SAHM, WAHM, or a working mother, we become so busy taking care of our little ones that we easily become isolated from our friends and those who can relate to our new realities. It's remarkable when a stranger (and not your grandmother) comments on your most recent blog post and a nice reminder that we all have something important to say.  

I invite you to follow my new blog, My Mom Michelle (that's me!) over at www.mymommichelle.blogspot.com. 

Put on Bed Rest for Pregnancy

As of today, I have been put on bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy.  It wasn't a total shock.  We knew there was an "issue" that we were actively monitoring, but we weren't necessarily expecting bed rest so quickly.  I am only 27 weeks along.  The baby is fully developed at this point, but she needs the extra time to develop her organs and gain weight.  She is roughly 2 pounds 4 ounces and is doing fine right now.

The "issue" is a growing hemorrhage at the insertion point of the umbilical cord into the placenta.  The hemorrhage occurred as the cord developed.  It was initially noticed on my 20week ultrasound, but it didn't become an "issue" until my ultrasound during week 24.  The hemorrhage has been described as a big bruise on the placenta. Based on its location (right at the insertion point), it can put pressure on the cord and affect blood/oxygen flow to the baby as/when it grows.  During my 27thweek ultrasound, they also found a resisted blood flow to the baby; this development is new and another reason I'm now on bed rest.

Nothing could have prevented the hemorrhage from happening.  My lifestyle or activity level didn't cause it.  It just happened.  I've learned that pregnancy and having babies really is a miracle and out of our control for the most part.  You just have to learn to deal with whatever happens.

My specialist is Tennessee Maternal Fetal Medicine.  They deal with high risk patients all of time and see this issue on a regular basis.  I also consulted with them during our last pregnancy loss.  They have been great to work with so far.  I will have (at least) a weekly ultrasound and they will also measure the blood flow from the cord to placenta and in baby's brain. They also gave me two steroid injections to help prepare baby's lungs in case of a premature delivery.  I'll still do all of my normal OBGYN stuff with Dr. Amanda Barrett, whom I love. She has been a great support during all of my pregnancy trials.  If the "issue" worsens, I will be hospitalized for bed rest and increased fetal monitoring. In the hospital, I would have daily ultrasounds and twice daily stress tests for baby.

I found a great article online, "A Primer on Premies" that describes the five most common medical ailments of premature babies. I found it informative and thought others may, too.  It's my understanding that nearly any baby born before 36 weeks will need some time in the NICU. But, my doctor said that I will be pleasantly surprised with how well baby could be if we can keep her in as long as possible.  And, Baptist has a tremendous amount of resources to treat premature babies, so I am confident that all will be done that can be done. We know some friends who've had premies that led to healthy babies. I'd love to hear from you if you had a really early delivery.

The drudgery of bed rest is unappetizing. I can only get up to use the rest room, take a shower once daily, and fix a quick sandwich.  I have a good chance of gaining a lot of weight. Thankfully, I have a contract with the University of Tennessee that I can work on from my computer.  Otherwise, insanity may be at my door and quickly....or a large online shopping bill.

I worry about J. While we have day care for JT covered through next week already (what a blessing!), he will have to bear the entire burden of watching him, cooking and cleaning on a reduced work schedule. I know he'll do a great job, but I worry about the extra stress as we want to avoid premature labor as long as possible.

I miss my health insurance policy with the State of Tennessee.  We paid $100 for all of my prenatal care and delivery.  $100!  It was an unbelievably generous policy and has unsurprisingly become less generous over the last year.  We'll easily pay $1,000-$3,000 for out-of-pocket expenses and co-payments with our new insurance.  If anyone has experience or knows how much NICU costs, I'd love to hear from you.  My sister-in-law just told me that my insurance may help with costs associated with bed rest, e.g., paying babysitters.  I'm definitely going to look that up and call them tomorrow.

If you have any experience with premies, I'd love to hear from you. Learning from others' experiences is a great way for us to understand what we are in for and prepare as best as we can.  Trying to manage the unknown is the most stressful part of this experience. I will have a lot of time on my hands, so feel free to call. We also won't turn down any offers to bring over dinner, fruit (and other healthy snacks to avoid obesity), TV show dvd series or hanging out with JT for an hour of two.  But, if life's too hectic, and I know how it is, just pray for us and baby Caroline (her name for now!); that she has the best outcome possible; comes into this world as healthy as possible; and helps us deal with whatever comes our way.

OMG! We're having a girl!

We recently found out that "Happy," the current name for our unborn child, is a girl. Those four letters (g-i-r-l) scare the heck out of me. I am more relaxed with boys given my tomboy nature and general lack of fru-fru-ness. I get acid reflex just thinking about the possibility of raising a cheerleader. Ugh.

I also feel a greater responsibility having to bring up a girl in today's society. Even with the career, political and societal accomplishments of women over the last fifty years, we are endlessly bombarded with negative messages affecting our self-image. Not only do I have to interpret the outside messages reaching my daughter, but I also have to be aware of the image that I portray to her on a daily basis. The latter is much more daunting.

To make myself feel better, I find myself trying to fixate on a smaller, more conquerable problem within this larger issue. This exercise led me to Barbie. I never really played with Barbies. They weren't of much interest to me, so I cannot claim firsthand knowledge of their positive or negative impact. I find Barbie's figure to be quasi-vulgar for little girls. It’s kind of ironic that the original Barbie’s appearance was inspired by a German prostitute. I doubt Mattel will be issuing a retro hooker Barbie anytime soon. When I see little girls playing with naked Barbies, I get the same queasy feeling when I see a toddler girl in a bikini. On the positive side, I like that Barbie has excelled in many professions. But, if I want to show my daughter that she can be anything she wants to be in life like a doctor or an engineer I don’t need Barbie for that. I can take her to see my friends Kayla and Mindy. The idea of Barbie as a professional role model is obsolete for my family, because I can show her real women with the same accomplishments.

During my mental debate, I sought the “internets” to learn more about the potential impact of little girls playing with Barbies. The best article I read was from a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. You can read it here. The author doesn’t single out Barbie as a primary offender but rather an accomplice in our culture’s distorted depiction of women that leads to negative body image in girls as early as five years old. Thankfully, the author says that parents have more influence than passive media messages and can help foster positive self-images for our little girls.

So, will I ban Barbie from our house? No, but I will, however, monitor how both my children play with their toys to express their thoughts. And, please don’t buy her a Barbie.

Why Cartoons Stink and my beef with Minnie Mouse

If you have young children, you probably end up watching your fair share of cartoons on Disney, PBS, Cartoon Network, etc. My husband indoctrinated our son into a morning cartoon routine several months ago. Even though the American Pediatrics Association doesn’t recommend any screen time for children under the age of two, I haven’t made it an “issue,” because our son isn’t very interested in tv. He likes the opening song to Mickey Mouse Club and the closing Hot Dog Dance. He tunes out everything in between. My problem is that I end up watching the entire episode instead of my son and the cartoons are driving me mad. Here are my three top complaints about the shows we “watch”:

1) The out of touch female roles in Mickey Mouse Club

Is there anything more stomach churning to a feminist than Minnie Mouse? Where is her substance? She teaches boys and girl viewers that girls should always be polite; that it’s important to coordinate hair accessories with clothing; women (even little girls) wear high heels; and they must carry on traditional female roles. One of her favorite hobbies is to bake! I love the idea of involving children in cooking but not because it enables you to become the ultimate people pleaser. Daisy is essentially Minnie’s copycat flunkie. Clarabelle, a cow, is a newer character and is Goofy’s unspoken love interest. The fact that all of the girl characters are assumed to be “betrothed” to a male character is out of line, but it is interesting that Disney decided to pair Goofy, a dog, with a cow. The final straw is that Clarabelle is a skinny cow. She is so skinny that a veterinarian would probably find it more humane to euthanize her if she were a real cow. Instead of creating a cow that is of normal weight, they make her skinny because she is a girl?

2) Inaccurate representation of capitalism in Handy Manny

If you have ever watched Handy Manny, you know that Manny goes to Kelly’s hardware store to buy supplies for every repair. One of the things I like best about Handy Manny is that it features small business owners and their social contributions in a town. What irks me most is that no one ever pays for anything! If Manny goes into Kelly’s hardware store to buy nuts and bolts, then viewers need to see him pay for those items with dollars! This is a very teachable moment about the use of money in our society. Why does Disney chose to avoid this conversation with children?

3) Little Einstein’s was created by pretentious intellectuals

Every episode of Little Einstein’s teaches viewers about significant artwork and classical music. I used to think this was a worthwhile endeavor. After a handful of episodes, though, you realize that the concept is too forced when the kids are trying to rhyme “ancient African pottery” with the tenth symphony by Dimitri Shostakovich.” Many toddlers cannot pronounce their “r’s”. Who is this show really for?

Are there any cartoons that leave you questioning what our society is trying to teach our children? Or, any shows that just drive you bonkers? I’d love to hear from you.

Life. It Happens

I've been away for a while.  My absence could have signaled the death of this blog like so many other blogs I've started.  But, this blog is different.  What happened, you ask?  Well, we moved. Then we moved again.  And, I worked on my first big contract.  Oh yeah, I also got pregnant!  We are finally getting settled into our new house and are waiting on our baby girl to arrive in mid-October.  2011 is going to be quite an exciting year.

First a Baby, then a Business

My son is now one year old!  That's also the amount of time that I've been out of the workforce.  I have been calling this time my "family sabbatical".  Like the outcome of many work-related sabbaticals, I have launched a business during mine.  For whatever reason(s), when you leave the workforce, you begin to wrestle with big life questions, like "what do I really want in my career."  For me, something had to be very important to me in order to compete with time with my son.  If you can afford it, it's liberating to allocate true value of your time versus what a company tells you your worth.  I was also motivated to start a business, because I grew very tired of not having a response to the question "What do you do?"  People, men and women, minimize your worth the second you say "I stay at home with my kid(s)."

Like many others who have been out of the workforce for a while, albeit voluntarily or involuntarily, you begin to interview yourself. What are my skills? Who needs these skills?  Very quickly, you also recognize what the market says you are worth.  From there, a series of calculations are made based on your own personal skills, network, guts and insanity.  If you are like me, at the end of all the number crunching and emotional wrangling, you decide to start a business.

Three things happened to me that finally prompted me to jump in:

1.  I got jealous.
During a much needed girls weekend last Fall, my friend SHOCKED me by telling me how well ($$$) her business was doing after only four years.  Granted, she is brilliant and extremely self-motivated, but it was somewhat of an ego crusher to compare my former career salary after seven years to her entrepreneur earnings after four.  My maternal instinct was overtaken by my competitive spirit for the first time since the arrival of our son.

2.  I got bored, really bored.
This one is easy to understand.  After working for seven years and being busy since forever, it was extremely hard to face a daily to-do list of emptying the dishwasher, laundry and tv viewing.  So, I hired a cleaning lady, chucked the laundry and divorced live tv.  My neighbors rejoiced, too.  They were beginning to give me the "go away, you stalker lady" look.

3.  Opportunity came knocking.
I was fortunate to be "hunted" versus "hunting" work, thanks to my social network.  I received a contract from someone who saw my LinkedIn profile status that I had posted six months earlier.  The status said that I'd be looking for short-term engagements in February and they contacted me in January.  That was the final kick in the behind I needed to start my business.

It turns out that I'm getting used to this whole birthing thing.  First a baby, then a business.  I'd love to hear from other moms with similar experiences.