Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Performance Anxiety

I think I've had a mental breakthrough.  You know how you get really nervous and anxious before a big game?  Well, that's how I feel when I have to participate in some type of significantly feminine event, like a baby shower (it also happens when I am socializing with a group of former cheerleaders). 

I've been worried about my baby showers for a couple of months (pathetic, I know).  What do I worry about, you ask? Did I invite everyone that I was spposed to?  Did someone's feelings get hurt?  Am I gracious enough to the hostesses? Do they know I appreciate them?  Basically, I don't know what the hell I am doing - a true duck out of water!  Nevertheless, I am proud to report that I have made it through 3 baby showers!  I think I performed particularly well.  I mingled with the different sub-groups of family - friends, relatives, friends, husband's cousins, etc.  I really was appreciative of all of the gifts - surely, my sincerity came through.  No one shot me dirty looks or said the dreaded Southern passive agressive put-down, "bless your heart."

The nerves never went away before the games, but I learned to trust that they would disappear at game time.  I hope that with more practice at these traditional female roles, I'll become more comfortable in my new "uniform".

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