The Year I became a Cheerleader

When I think back on the past year, it has been full of record setting emotional highs and lows. Even with my professional life at a complete standstill for most of the year, 2010 was life changing for me in a way that few other years can compete. 

As a self-proclaimed jock mom, I haven't exactly been in tune with certain emotional corners of my "feminine mystique". Don't get me wrong, I cry, okay, sob, during some romantic comedies.  I have a considerable amount of empathy for others and a strong desire to help people. While I recognize that I possess many of these so-called feminine traits, I would like to also point out that these qualities can be found in some very good men.

The point I'm trying to make is that some females are born with a fully developed female mothering gene. These girls play with dolls as toddlers, have toy kitchen sets and take home economics classes by choice in high school. Other females, like myself, preferred gender neutral toys like stuffed animals to dolls, played outside and lived for sports during high school.  That so called mothering gene laid dormant in our tomboy bodies for quite some time.

One of my strongest memories from childhood is my consistent desire to have been born a boy. In my young mind, boys had it easy. If I'd been born a boy, I would have enjoyed more acceptance playing sports, more freedom to do as I pleased, and, just as importantly, less annoyance from dealing with girly things like trying to fix my hair, applying makeup, complicated female friendships, bodily changes, fashion decisions, etc. I held a grudge against God for for several summers for not making me a boy.

Then came puberty and boyfriends and my grudge slowly faded into an unconscious acceptance and eventual happiness with my feminine existence. While I continued to avoid hair styling and makeup, I made considerable advancements in many other feminine traits which leads us back to the mothering gene.

It is my opinion that girls with the full-blown mothering gene are disproportionately attracted to the activity of cheerleading.  Even while there have been considerable male advancements, let's admit that there are few activities quite as "feminine" as cheerleading. In movies, cheerleaders are always portrayed as the prettiest and most popular girls in school that every other girl dreamed of being. Let me tell you, I NEVER wanted to be a cheerleader, ever. At the time, the thought of sitting on the sidelines and watching other people perform was about as stupid to me as standing at a bus stop with no intention of getting on. I could not see what was in it for them.

Looking at it now, those girls were a part of something even if they were on the sidelines of the main event. They were there to watch, support and cheer us on, even if they could do nothing to affect the outcome of the game. They decorated our lockers and held pep rallies. They suffered when we suffered and celebrated our victories for us. 

One of the biggest lessons I've learned since becoming a mother is the satisfaction that can come from selfless giving.  Starting with pregnancy, you turn over your body for the development of another. If he needs room to stretch his legs, you put up with going to the bathroom four times at night. When he is born, you sacrifice your sleep, sanity and cognitive ability so that he's fed when he's hungry, held when he's lonely and changed when he's dirty. As he grows, you are on constant watch for what he'll need, anticipating the diaper change, the favorite toy and desired snack. Sitting on the sidelines is no easy job! Looking in the mirror, I see pom poms, and I smile. I cheer because I mother.